Ok next statement - I can't commit to getting in shape. And I will look better if I do. So already I know the statement is absolutely a falsehood. It shouldn't read I can't it should read I won't. The problem here is why won't I ? What's the pay off? If the truth is I won't commit I want to understand why. Could it simply be I love the taste of food, could it be I'm too lazy, could it be some deeper underlying issue? I really don't seem to know and I want an answer. And then sometimes it totally pisses me of that it is necessary to look better. If I was the last person alive or lived on a deserted island would I give a fig about that ....hmmm. So maybe the real underlying issue is that I think I need to look better. Interestingly enough my coaching is just to journal through these and then we'll discuss more. So I'll continue to dialog with myself.
But its not just me. If I am being 100% truthful - I do think those who are in shape look better - whatever better is - but why? And why does it matter? Am I overthinking this. I don't think so. Body image so dominates our culture I think it allows a mental state of paralyses so we can't move in - I honestly think what I truly desire more is confidence in who I am - and I don't believe I can get there until I'm thin or at least that's what my ego believes So once again - I should commit but .....\I AM BEAUTIFUL. I AM GORGEOUS. I AM PRETTY.
Oh I need some help.....I can't believe......
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